What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

Penis.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

What is Bigfoots favorite food? Biscuits and Gravy.

The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

What do you call a thirsty girl? H2Hoe

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

like for a handjob.

What's brown and sticky? Poo

A jew go out of a bar

Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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