Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

Lil' Wayne

Why didn't Jimmy's mum come to the school play? She had a heart attack

How do you fit 90 Jews in a Volkswagen Bug? You can't.

i dislike sack in my mouth

a guy walks into a bar the barman says "what'll it be?"

What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? Nothing. It turns out it wasn't his wife, he was cheating on her with his mistress, the woman he was having sex with now, thus destroying their marriage.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

GUYS! I GOT AN A IN MY PIANO EXAM!!!!!

Two black guys walk into a bar and arrest the under age drinkers

what is white and red all over? a ginger

Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

Roses are brown, violets are brown, who is s***ing in my garden?

What do you call an anti joke with no punchline?

Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock who's there? the chicken

What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

A white man and a black woman run for president The Black woman received 65% of all woman votes, 75% of all Hispanics and 99% of all black votes. The White man still won, and was a great president.

Where is my tractor?

Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

A man entered into a house, because it hadn't any door.

What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cata dont talk.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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