Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

thumb_up thumb_down

whats sad about three black men driving off a cliff in a cadillac? a cadillac seats five.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do magnets work?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

i eat poop

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you get all the apples off of an apple tree? You pick them

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how do you spell ugly ? U G L Y.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A Blonde, a Brunette, and a Red head were on a plane. They never met, and went their separate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what reason a man dont cry when the dog of his own childs dies? *guess the answer now a) he killed it b) he didnt like it c) a + b

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why didn't bobby eat breakfast? because i stapled his head to the floor

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Swiggity Swooty. I'm currently in pursuit for that part of your body people refer to as "booty".

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock knock Who's there My dick

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why is your hair black? it was heretitery.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Dear Sarah, Your a damn lesbian! Sincerely Adam Claypool

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Doctor, doctor! I think I'm a pair of curtains... Well don't worry, you've come to the right place. We'll get you the help you need.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the blonde do when she missed bus 40? She waited 30 minutes for it to come back around again.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Chuck Norris can drive a car using just his hands and feet!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A. I have a really funny knock knock joke to tell you! You start. B. Knock knock A. Who's there? B. ....

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops