How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down

What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worst that the Holocaust? Another one.

thumb_up thumb_down

If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

thumb_up thumb_down

Chuck Norris

thumb_up thumb_down

Do you have a curfew? No its saturday!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a bar and says "ouch." It was an Iron bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If you asked an alzheimer's patient what the meaning of life is, what answer would you get? Probably an answer that doesn't respond to the question but is bound to be hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do magnets work?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How did the fat man die? Type 2 diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

a man pulled up to a girl in a white van with tinted windows. he told the girl he had candy inside. she got in the van. he then proceeded to rape becasue he was a rapist and that is the lifestyle he choose to have.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why is nick a dumb ass? because hes not a smart ass

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what reason a man dont cry when the dog of his own childs dies? *guess the answer now a) he killed it b) he didnt like it c) a + b

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the Jewish boy grab his groin? Because he was just circumcised.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I don't like movies. Because ticket prices are overwhelming.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the Vietnemese prostitute ask for the phone? Because she wanted to use the phone.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A fat guy at starbucks, waiting for his regular 160lbs breakfest. why is the 10 black kid crying? he's hungry and there is no starbucks in somalia .

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops