Your mum so fat, she died of a heart attack

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I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

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Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

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A white man and a black woman run for president The Black woman received 65% of all woman votes, 75% of all Hispanics and 99% of all black votes. The White man still won, and was a great president.

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why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

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A horse walks into a bar the bar tender says hey you cant be in here you are a horse so the horse leaves.

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Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

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baby loves lalma

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

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What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

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what happened to the autistic child that traveled to antarctica? he died.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

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Guess What? What? Get in the van.

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Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Smart Blondes

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Why couldn't Simon run? Because he had Cerebral Palsy.

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Why do policemen wear belts? To hold up their pants.

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Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

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What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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