Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Why was the swing in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the eighty year old man climb into a fridge? Because he wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down +131

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

Darude - Sandstorm

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Q: What would you do for a Klondike bar? A: I would make the slightly onerous journey to the local grocery establishment and pay my hard-earned money to procure a dessert which I quite enjoy.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Yo mamma's so black, and that's ok. We're all different and unique.

thumb_up thumb_down +114

A man walked into a store and asked if he could use the restroom. They found this acceptable and let him use it.

thumb_up thumb_down +94

What happens when you have fish and a rhino mate? Nothing, that is physically impossible, a rhino is a lot bigger than a fish and it would not be possible for a rhino to do that with a fish considering a rhino can't breathe under water and a fish can't breath with out air.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was there a lion in the bathroom? Because I threw a refrigerator at it and stapled a frog to its butthole, all while it was being chased by a 10 foot scorpion and a purple salmon that only had 1 eye.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did Jesus say to his disciples at the Last Supper? Go to Hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -80

What is worse than finding 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? Finding 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -134

Roses are red, violets are blue something stinks and I think it's you!

thumb_up thumb_down +89

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call it when 1 person has an imaginary friend? A mental disorder. What do you call it when 1 billion people have an imaginary friend? A Religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +156

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +92

What did Chuck Norris say to the boy? Sure I'll sign your t-shirt!

thumb_up thumb_down +64

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman went in a hot air balloon and had a magical afternoon that none of them will ever forget, except the Scotsman because he fell out during take off and is now in a coma.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why was Jesus able to walk on water? Because he was the son of God and therefore devine, he can do whatever he pleases

thumb_up thumb_down +50

September 8, 2011 Amy Winehouse: 46 days sober. Date of death: July 23, 2011

thumb_up thumb_down +14

The NHL playoffs

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops