im a selling a car

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

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what is black and white and red all over.....a nun being murdered

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

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SC Johnson a Family Company

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call of duty is how they say it, calla duty is how we say it...

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Blarg

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What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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What did the little girls who's parents died in a car accident get for her birthday? Foster Parents

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm going to kill your family.

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Guess what's funny? People voting for their own Anti joke.

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Q: What did Mr. Spock say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

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Why was the jewish girl happy? Her pussy was wet!

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I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

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Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

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Not much of an anti joke but here we go... - What do you get when you cross a jew and a potato? - A Baked potato!

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Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

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Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

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roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

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So a black man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He payed for the drink and couldn't have been more courteous

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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