Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A man walks into a bar. I don't know what happened next because I was waiting outside for my friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Nah

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Yo momma's so fat and thank god because I'm a chubby chaser.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down +34

democracy

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How many Grand Jurists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on if it was a cop that snuffed out the light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

thumb_up thumb_down +32

why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

how do you keep a blond in sespence you dont tell her

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

I have no ideas.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops