yo mamas so fat, she started working out

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who can jump higher than mount everest? anyone. mount everest cant jump

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Why was the puppy sad? It was burning alive

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Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

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How do you confuse a blonde? You tell em a AntiJoke!

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Say, "Wake up!"

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If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

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What did the dead man say at his own funeral? Nothing, he's dead...

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What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

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What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

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-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

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What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

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"Up to 50% off."

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What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

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Your mother is a man.

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I went to a hockey game and the strangest thing happened; 2 players got into a fight!

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Why don't women need watches? Because they have clocks on their cell phones because they have jobs outside of the house and are INDEPENDENT WOMEN! MEN DO NOT DEFINE THEM!

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Why do showers in Germany have 11 holes? Because a regular human on has 10 fingers.

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Is this a chair?

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Why did he walk the dinosaur He took an arrow to the knee so much the DJ didn't was paper-plates.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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