Hey, name is Anita, I am Nero`s nurse, he told me to say that if you wish to speak any further, you are going to have to call him and prove you are not some guy. Say Tifa, do you ever play videogames?

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

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Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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Anti jokes.

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My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to give a doctor the cure for cancer but some ass hole ran him over

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What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

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jeremie er en ape hvorfor er han det? Who cares!

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Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

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Barack Obama

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Want to see a funny movie? -Watch Schindler's List

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead!

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a dude goes to vegas and loses his money, the moral of the story is not to trust the internet this story was written by The Internet

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There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops