Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. What hit the wall first? Probably his penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the boy stop playing nintendo 64? He choked on a red M and M and struggled for air until he fell lifelessly on the floor, landing on his pet mole, furthermore, dying and killing the animal as well. It was loose loose situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What was Jonas's big success? Being Steven Spielbergs lead actor in his famous 1982 film.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Well, I have to go eat again "Axel Knight". See you around soon enough, just give me a call if you want me around... Hopefully I find a fucking telescope so I can read the code on the chip thingie... Damn I am hungry. See you around sugartits.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What's the point? A: .

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man and woman are out to eat on their first date. When the woman goes to pay, the man explains that he will cover the cost of the meal. That's a good thing because the woman didn't actually have any money. This happens all the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

You want to hear a joke? Adobe Flash Player.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's black and white and red all over? A nun in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

1234 5

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Mitt Romney for president.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the fat kid break his leg? He got hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +15

You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the black guy smell so bad? Because he accidently jumped into a pool of garbage disposal.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops