WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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Why did John scream when he came in to his bedroom? He stepped on a nail

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There is a white man, a black guy, and an Asian in a car. It got into an accident who did it? Asian dude

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How do magnets work?

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Four homosexuals walk into a bar and theres only one bar stool left how do they all sit down on that one bar stool. They flip the bar stool around and sit down all together

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Polly went out for a cigarette. Then she was raped.

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69

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A fat guy at starbucks, waiting for his regular 160lbs breakfest. why is the 10 black kid crying? he's hungry and there is no starbucks in somalia .

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Who wakes up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy? P. Diddy.

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Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

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Why did the girl run across the street? Because she was being chased by a man with a knife

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What does wasabi spell backwards? Ibasaw

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What do you call two guys hanging by your window? Kurt and Rod

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

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Kesley Ioannou not shopping.

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2 Jews walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks and call a cab to get home

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Why did brad pay the sexy looking librarian with a big smile on his face? Becouse brad returned his books to late and had to pay a fine for that. The librarian made a joke about the fact that it was a waste of money to return the books late.

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The WNBA.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because skeletons are no longer sentient beings and cannot move.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!" The other bar patrons ask him what is wrong, to which he replies, "I stubbed my toe."

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What is the biggest, most elaborate lie? Santa Clause

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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