What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

anne hatthaway

An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

How come George hit his face when he fell? He had no arms.

blind man walks into a . . . .. .

chuck norris is meeeeean to pain.

AHHHHHHH OMGOMG OMG I SAY TO MY MUM SHE RUNS INTO THE ROOM SCREEMING AND SAYS WHAT HAPPEND I SAY ....................... i forgot now (k.c)

YOLO

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

What's worse than locking your keys in ur at outside of an abortion clinic? Going in side and asking for a coat hanger!!

Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

what was sad about six black guys driving off a cliff in a cadallac? They were my friends

What do you call a gay man flying an aeroplane? A pilot.

Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

Why was Sally a bad driver? Because she rarely signals and never checked her blind spots.

A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

Why Do Indians Not Like Snow? Because it is white and on their land

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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