Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

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Why did the little girl selling lemon aid die? Someone drove by and threw a fridge at her

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How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? a boyscout comes back from camp.

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What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

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What did the Muslim do after his friend told him a funny joke ? Laugh.

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

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Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says: why the long face? Horse: I have cancer

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a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

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Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

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Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam? To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

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what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

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Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

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Why did hitler need glasses? Because he could Nazi.

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What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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