Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

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What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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What do u call a black guy with a gun? A police officer u racist bastard

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Dani Barton is a heart breaking 13 yr old.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Did you know that there is no A is "sodimizing"?

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knock, knock . whos there? the police. get the hell outside !

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You remind me of something. What? Summer Why because I'm hot? no because there is no class..

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a blond applies to college she gets in because she did well in highschool

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What is worse

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Two black people jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

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Imagine: You are trapped in a prizon cell with no doors, no windows, no furniture and completely sealed in with nothing. What do you do? Stop imagining!

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What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

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This is not a good joke.

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What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

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What would Martin Luther King Jr. be today if he was white? Alive.

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Why was the chimp late for his flight? Because chimps arent allowed through airport security.

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What's red and creeps up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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Why did the girl run across the street? Because she was being chased by a man with a knife

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how do u get a nun pregnant? dress her up as an alter boy

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

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A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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