Do you want to hear a joke? Yes? Well that's probably why you came to this site.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

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What happens when you stab a black man? An equal race rights protest.

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How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

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two guys are waiting at a train station...6 hours later one guy turns to the other and says "train aint coming"

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What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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What did dean carmon say to his brother? - I don't know I'm not his brother

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

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1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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why did Max cry??? chicken

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Why was Little Susie's IQ less than 30? Because, she is mentally retarted.

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A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

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Justin Beiber does not have a really good voice.

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

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Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

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Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

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Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops