Why didn't the black man drink out of the white water fountain? Because he wasn't thirsty.

Why did the boy cross the road Because he needed to get to the bus stop

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He nearly died, and was diagnosed with numerous dietary problems.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

BWAT

A bar walks into a bar, it is then you realize you are in an alternate dimension.

Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

whats black and yellow and makes you smile? a bus full of black people going off a cliff. do you shame is? there was three empty seats.

why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

Black Veil Brides.

Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

Adolf Hitler was a humanitarian.

What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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Q: What's white, sticky, and is swallowed by most women? A: Ice Cream

a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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