What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

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What is the biggest lie in the universe? I love you.

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What is brown and sticky?

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hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

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What do you get when you kill a black man? The death penalty.

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You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

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What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

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How many jews can you fit in a car? However many seats there are

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

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Chapter 6 : The pimp ``scooby`` tells how delivered the poor young people to people with money.

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Q: Whats more fun that nailing babys to a fence? A: Ripping them off.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

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Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

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What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

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How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

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What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

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Penis-Pump

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What's worse than a giant paint bubble? TWO GIANT PAINT BUBBLES!

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What's cold and icy? Ice

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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