Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

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First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

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Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs? A: Probably right where you left him, since animals with no appendages have no way of mobility

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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Why did the woman have sex with the man? Because she is over 18, which is above all of the legal consent ages in the United States.

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How many wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. They prefer digging burrows for hibernation.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

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How did Helen Kellers parents punish her? They moved the furniture.

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Why do black people call white people "Niggas"? Because they took an overdose of KFC and watermelon, they're actually just insulting themselves.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

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Your mom is so dumb, she has difficulty acquiring a job to support her family.

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What's the difference between a white person and a black person? The presence of melanin in their skin, as well as often their socioeconomic and cultural backgrounds.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What was Jonas's big success? Being Steven Spielbergs lead actor in his famous 1982 film.

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was about to get raped.

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I saw a chameleon. Then it died

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What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

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Q: What's the point? A: .

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why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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