what did the scientist say in Siberia? burrrrrrrrrrilium

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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what did the crippled boy get for christmas? cancer.

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Do you ever feel, like a plastic bag? No, because plastic bags are man-made inanimate objects.

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A black guy moves in to your neighborhood. The housing values plummet due to the current economic recession.

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Q: What cracks while having sex? A: The pelvis of a four year old...

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How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!

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what happend when the car hit the wall? it exploded and 4 people were injured, 2 were bystanders

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Her lips are not proportionally fit to her face.

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Why did the boy die at his Halloween party? He was the victim of a drive-by.

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How do you get all the apples off of an apple tree? You pick them

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Four homosexuals walk into a bar and theres only one bar stool left how do they all sit down on that one bar stool. They flip the bar stool around and sit down all together

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell an Anti-Joke.

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There was a dedicates Muslim man on a plane. He was travelling to Melbourne for a business conference so he could help support his family as well as he can.

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So a man walks into a bar and says to the bartender I'll have a beer

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Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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How do Chinese people name their kids? The couple discuss possible names and then pick the one that they feel suits the child best.

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When Life gives you lemons... Squeeze the juice right back into Life's eyes!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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