Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

Knock knock (No one is home)

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

do you like fishsticks? yes they are quite delicious

Why do all black people have nightmares? Beacause we killed the only one with a dream..

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

Q:Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple A:You have AIDS

Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

The Holocaust

Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

What do you call a black guy with a fan? An African American male Homo Sapien who is most likely hot and sweaty and is probably trying to create cold air and then reduce how hot they are likely reducing the sweat glands natural instict to create ameliorate of sweat and then make him feel better.

Yo momma's so fat and thank god because I'm a chubby chaser.

Friends are like trees. They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

why did Max cry??? chicken

What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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