How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? over 100

A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

What do you call a man with short legs? Whatever his name is

Compton

Come over here boy and have a cigar, you're gonna go far. Congratulations on being the first human cannonball, please use the cigar to light the fuse. Happy landings.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because SEVEN-FIVE!!!

I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? You set her on fire.

I used to be an adventurer like you. Then i took an arrow to the knee.

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A: You can't wear cleats on a trampoline.

A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

What's worse than a dead man?  2 dead men

Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

R.I.P Ryan Dunn.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A bad decision because soccer is in their blood

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had legs and knew how to walk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...