what's worse than one scoop of ice crea falling on the floor? - the holocaust what's worse than two scoops of ice cream falling on the floor? - nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Whats long and hard on a black man..... 2nd grade

thumb_up thumb_down +21

You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red Violets are blue What was I saying? Oh yeah, your adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what do u call a person who reads anti.jokes a hipster

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A gay man walks into a bar has a few drinks then goes home without being recognized as a homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did Dela Ware? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

how do you wake up lady gaga? scream in her ear.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Oh. So his name's Brandon.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A jew, a catholic and an atheist are in the desert. They see a dusty lamp. They take it and rub it. Once the lamp is clean, they put it back on the sand and kep walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats another word for Thesaurus?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Doris want to father children? Because she wanted to have a fry-up with the leftover baby oil

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One jew to screw in the light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I cat tried to jump over a fence It was electrified

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: what happens when you throw a red rock into a blue lake? A: a splash.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did he walk the dinosaur He took an arrow to the knee so much the DJ didn't was paper-plates.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

My friends are like trampolines I have none

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops