Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

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Q: Has your ear operation had success? A: Hotdog with chili.

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This one time, at band camp we played in a band

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What's better than winning at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A tragic accident waiting to happen.

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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Dani Barton is a heart breaking 13 yr old.

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A woman went out and had a great time with her friends. Then she walked home alone and got viciously raped by 4 large black men.

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A fat guy at starbucks, waiting for his regular 160lbs breakfest. why is the 10 black kid crying? he's hungry and there is no starbucks in somalia .

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Why did the Nazi not help the black man up after he had been badly injured? The Nazi was in a wheelchair.

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Q:Whats worse than 100 babies in 1 dumpster? A:1 dead baby is 100 dumpsters.

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Why did the tree fall down? Because no one caught it.

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It says so on your cap.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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What's blue and smells like yellow paint? Blue paint.

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What's green and has wheels? A chinese race car driver.

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What's up? A direction...

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

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Why is it called a tea kettle Because it is a kettle and you make tea in it

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a dog walks into a drug store and orders a bone. what does the cashier do? she wakes up.

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antijokes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops