This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? That she should train harder for her next boxing match, or find a less physically demanding hobby to partake in.

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What did the mail man say to the resident? I have your mail. Now let's f*ck.

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what's the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

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Roses are tits, Violets are tits, I love tits. Tits.

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whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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A Jew, a Mexican, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Get the f*ck out."

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why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

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Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

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How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

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A black man and a mexican jump from a tree. Who hits the ground first? The mexican. The black man had a rope tied around his neck.

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jess yawns with no hands in front of her mouth. true story.

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There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

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Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

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A horse walks into a glue factory..

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

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What would you like to drink? A Pepsi. Is Coca-Cola okay? No.

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8=D

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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Whats worse than finding one worm in your apple? Two worms.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm colorblind

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What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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