When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

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Whats Green and has wheels? Grass, I was kidding about the wheels.

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What happened september 11th, 2001 It was my first time snorkoling in Hawaii

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What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Animal control.

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A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

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Whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah Witness.

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What's green and has wheels? A chinese race car driver.

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Why did the black man swim across the lake? He didnt. He drowned

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Chuck Norris. Alright come in.

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Did you know, that every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes?

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did you know the leading cause of funerals is death?

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!" The other bar patrons ask him what is wrong, to which he replies, "I stubbed my toe."

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Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

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I am awesome, you are not, i am awesome, you smoke pot!

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

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Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

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Whats worse than finding a black man in your bed? After you sleep with him, he tells you he has AIDS.

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What happens when you shoot a black man? You go to prison because murder is a criminal offense.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ben. Oh hi! come in.

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what is pink stinky? your butthole lol

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You might be a redneck if you are a an uneducated white farm laborer from the south.

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who hooked up with Sinead Walker? • Liam Findlay

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Why didn't Jimmy's mum come to the school play? She had a heart attack

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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