Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

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a man walks into a bar, and says "can i get a beer please?" the bartender hands him his beer, and as soon as the man starts to take a drink, the man dies of a massive heart attack because of his unhealthy lifestyle

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?", laughs at his own joke, then calls animal control.

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Why was the pilot suspended from flight? He was the terrorist who caused 911. OUCHH

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A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC.

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What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

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Knock Knock. Who the hells there? Nevermind.

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Terrance was going to clean his room but then he got high, do you know why? because terrance is addicted to illicit street drugs and should seek medical help.

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How any blondes dose it take to screw in a lightbulb? 3 one to hold the light bulb and two to rotate the ladder

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Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

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wat did the candle say to the lighter? nothing candles cant speak because they are inamimate objects, even so i think a candle would just scream anyway, would you buy a screaming candle?

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turned to the other and said, "Boy, its getting hot in here." The other muffin said, "WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HERE US SCREAM."

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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What is 10 inches long and didnt get sucked on valentines day? Whitney Houston's crack pipe.

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alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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Whats red and hairy ? A carpet !

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Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

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Whats sad about 3 mexicans getting hit by a train They were remodeling my kitchen

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

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What is this a book??!!! What am I supposed to do...... READ IT?????!!!!!!!!!

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

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what do you call a fish without eyes? a fshhhhh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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