What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

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A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

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What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

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What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

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why was the Jewish child sad? He was recently abandoned by all his family.

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Q: Why is the sun so bright? A: Because it reads books!

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whats pale and white your ass.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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I like my woman like I like my coffee. Good.

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A boy goes into Mourne View and meets a girl what happens next? He's now a father living off of the dole.

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A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

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a

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If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

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How many girls does it take to sell out a Justin Beiber concert? None, all of them are boys.

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Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

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Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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Whats funnier than killing a black guy. Nothing, it's not funny.

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Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

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*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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