What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

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Why did the man not make any change at his job? Because he is Barack Obama.

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What's worse than 9 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 9 trees.

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Do you know why your mom is so bold? Becaus she's got cancer

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What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

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Mr. Burns sex scandal.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

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hey.

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¿melano?

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What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

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What do you call a muslim? A terrorist

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A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

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It's your mother, open the door.

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yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

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cot!

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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What do you cal a thousand black people swimming to Africa with a Jew under each arm? Waterboarding.

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Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the chicken fall off the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops