Wanna hear a joke? My penis size.

There are four types of people in this world. I never said I would name them all

Q: Has your ear operation had success? A: Hotdog with chili.

Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

Why Was my mommy gone last night? -cause I ****ed her

What's so funny about an anti-joke? Nothing.

Poop

Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

What's black and white and red all over? A cow being processed

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a truck

Why did the boy die at his Halloween party? He was the victim of a drive-by.

What does the scarecrow from the wizard of oz and a zombie have in common? They both want brains.

When life gives you: High Fructose Corn Syrup,Citric Acid, Ascorbic Acid,Maltodextrin, Sodium Acid Phosphate, Magnesium Oxide, Calcium Fumarate, Yellow 5, Tocopherol, and less than 2% natural flavours... Make lemonade.

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

What do you call a dumb Asian? An Asian who lacks education.

Mommy, where do babies come from? In biology, sex is a process of combining and mixing genetic traits, often resulting in the specialization of organisms into a male or female variety (each known as a sex). Sexual reproduction involves combining specialized cells (gametes) to form offspring that inherit traits from both parents. Gametes can be identical in form and function (known as isogametes), but in many cases an asymmetry has evolved such that two sex-specific types of gametes (heterogametes) exist: male gametes are small, motile, and optimized to transport their genetic information over a distance, while female gametes are large, non-motile and contain the nutrients necessary for the early development of the young organism. An organism's sex is defined by the gametes it produces: males produce male gametes (spermatozoa, or sperm) while females produce female gametes (ova, or egg cells); individual organisms which produce both male and female gametes are termed hermaphroditic. Frequently, physical differences are associated with the different sexes of an organism; these sexual dimorphisms can reflect the different reproductive pressures the sexes experience. Thanks mommy

girls are a lot like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

Q- Whats The Difference Between a Jew and a TV Dinner? A- One Gets Cooked in the Oven and the other is a TV Dinner!

What do you call a guy so fat that he can't fit in a bath tub? A guy so fat that he can't fit in a bath tub.

Q: What did the ugly duckling say to the other ducks? A: QUACK!

An illegal Mexican immargrant was deported for the selling an use of marijuana. the sad part is this happens everyday

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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