whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

Why is the horse gay. He rapes 3 children

scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

Why did the basketball player shoot the ball? Because it was being mean to him

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

What do you call a dead black guy? A TERRIBLE CRIME

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share personal information with a stranger.

Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

1234 5

How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

Cassie Mills you are gay stop being silly in class you're not funny.

Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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