Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

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What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

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¿melano?

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A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

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I like my coffee like I like my women Without a penis

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Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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It's your mother, open the door.

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yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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What do you cal a thousand black people swimming to Africa with a Jew under each arm? Waterboarding.

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cot!

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What's worse than hearing another Holocaust anti-joke? The Holocaust.

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Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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If a plane crashes on the border of America and Canada, where do you bury the survivors? Somewhere discreet where no one will find them

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican guy walk into a bar. They are good interracial friends that like to put down some brewski's with eachother

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Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the chicken fall off the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

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anti jokes are like dogs They both rhyme with Maths

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What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

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What did Abe Lincoln say before he gave the Gettysburg Address? No one knows, its not documented.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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