What did the lion say to the octopus? Nothing, lions can't talk, and even if they did the chances of a lion and octopus meeting are very slim.

Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share personal information with a stranger.

Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

Why couldn't the moose find a good hotel for the night? A moose wouldn't have any currency available and quite frankly, no one would let him in.

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

Compton

Wanna hear a joke? A joke.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot.

Why did he walk the dinosaur He took an arrow to the knee so much the DJ didn't was paper-plates.

*you're

Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers have no feelings.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

what said the girl when the roof collapsed over her nothing she died

Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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