Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

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Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

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How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

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One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

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Why couldn't the young boy go trick or treating? He was a diabetic.

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Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

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there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

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what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

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DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

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You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He quickly exits as he thought it was the Polish restaurant located directly nextdoor. He then enters the Polish restaurant and orders a delicious lunch. He tips his waiter 20%.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Q: What is green, blue, white and red? A: They're colors

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Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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