Doctor! Doctor! Can I have a second opinion? The Doctor then sits the patient down and tells them from a different perspective that they have terminal Cancer and will be dead by the end of the year.

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What do Laura Bush and 9/11 have in common? George Bush did them.

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Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

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Knock, knock. Come in!

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Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

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A Man walks into a car dealership and asks the salesman "How many of these Blue ones do you have in stock" ? The salesman looks at the Man and begins to cry. "Why are you crying" asks the Man "I had a dog named Blue once" replied the salesman. And then he ate a taco in front of the Man,wiped his hands on his slacks and slowly backed away from him. The Man thought to himself..."Gee I'm hungry" and left the car dealership to go buy a taco instead.

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Whats funnier than a jew holding a nickel. Nothing. Jews are cheap.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The holocaust.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had legs and knew how to walk.

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your mom is so gay that...wrong, a homosexual women is considered a lesbian.

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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You won't put that in your ass.... No shit.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Not the World Trade Center.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

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Q: What is the most common question among children? A: How are babies made?

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Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

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What do you do when you see a one legged black man? Stop laughing and reload.

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A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

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There was an old man from Limerick. He was of scottish ancestry and nearing his 76th birthday.

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If u and I jumped off a cliff..who would land first? who cares..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops