A recently engaged couple are having sex. The man finishes in just under 3 minutes as usual. The woman then says "I love you" because they've been together for over 2 years and they care for each other very deeply.

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I am awesome, you are not, i am awesome, you smoke pot!

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A man walks to a bar. He drinks too much and dies. His family is informed later that evening.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There's no way to know. The chicken can't speak any humanly comprehensible languages so any reason we can determine is pure speculation.

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What happened to the man that jumped off the cliff. He died....

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Why is that blond girl so dumb? Because she has fetal alcohol syndrome.

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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sticks and stones may break my bones but cataracts will prohibit you from eyesight

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"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

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Roses are brown, violets are brown, who is s***ing in my garden?

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What is worse than a paper cut? two paper cuts What is worse than two paper cuts The Holocaust What is worse than The Holocaust Three paper cuts

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Whats sad about 3 mexicans getting hit by a train They were remodeling my kitchen

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting fisted by hulk

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why did the man blink because i put a gun to his head.

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My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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I told a woman to make me a turkey sandwich. Of course she complied since I was at Subway.

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Q: What did the black guy say when he stubbed his toe? A: Ouch.

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Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

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A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

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What does a cupcake get for Christmas? A fat kid.

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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