A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share personal information with a stranger.

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Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

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Can I touch it?

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What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

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Teen pregnancy

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Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

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I pissed myself the other day in Harrods when I saw a Somalian boy run up to a curtain saying mummy.

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a black guy leaves prison

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Roses are green Violets are yellow Those are the wrong colors oh well who gives a shit.

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Steve Jobs.

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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A Horse walks into a Bar The Bartender runs for his life as he is tripping on acid and believes the horse is a sheep. He doesn't like sheep.

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what happend to the ghost? he dissapeared! :)

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

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why did the boy have no friends ? Because he lived in a small cottage miles away from any civilization with his overly strict parents who would not let him see the daylight and deprived him of any kind of childhood, he has no social skills and does not know how to interact with other human beings at no fault of his own. he is also dead

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Why didn't the blonde laugh at my blonde joke? She's dead. She should of laughed at my jokes more.

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what did one mexican say to the other Hi.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

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why couldnt helen keller drive? because shes a woman.

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why cant the black man vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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