Knock knock SCREW YOU I BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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Why Sam Vitale gay? Because he loves men!

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How do you stop a plane? Throw flying birds at it.

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Your Mother is so pretty that she does not need make-up.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

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What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Your breath smells like onions.

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Your mother is so ugly, because she was badly beaten.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This difference is due largely to the alteration of the white light wavelenght as it excites the electrons in both flowers and the absorption of most of the other colours of the spectrum.

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When life hands you lemons, Squeeze them in the eyes of children

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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Knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock, Who's there? Woodpecker. Woodpecker who? Woodpecker.

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? genocide whats worse than genocide? getting raped by a giant scorpion

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So a man walks into a bar and says to the bartender I'll have a beer

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why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

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Q: Why didn't the chicken cross the road. A: because he's a chicken?

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok.

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What flys? A fly

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knock knock. whos there?(haha ive never made my own joke before) Nick Nick who? Nick Saghir Oh, come in. Would you like some cookies?

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A man went into a bakers to buy a loaf of bread. The baker said 'What can i do for you sir?' The man said 'Id like a loaf of blue bread please.' Baker replied 'Sorry sir we only sell brown or white here.' 'Thats ok.' said the man, 'I have my bike outside.' [This joke was made up by myself and my school friends in 1975 age 15. We all told it for years - i still do - and cried with laughter whenever we heard it. We called them non jokes :-) ]

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Why did Harry go to the store? He was out of food.

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Your doorbell is broken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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