Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

HARRY EFFING STYLES

Fat people are harder to kidnap!!

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

A bar walks into a bar, it is then you realize you are in an alternate dimension.

Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

what do you call a sock that is no longer white a dirty sock

GRAAAAAAAAAAAR.

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

Which way do gay people walk? in One Direction

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

Since little kids sleep with stuffed bears, do bears sleep with stuffed humans?

Do you know what a deaf guy says to a blind guy? God told me you'll see your path.

Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...