A UNIX guru walks in to a restaurant and asks for day's special. Waiter responds "tartar steak." UNIX guru thinks that "steak.tar.tar just doesn't make any sense" and responds "I'll just have tar steak."

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what did the dead woman say the boy? I am dead.

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You might be a redneck if you are a an uneducated white farm laborer from the south.

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Why is that blond girl so dumb? Because she has fetal alcohol syndrome.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

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Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

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How did the blonde screw in a lightbulb? She didn't, she fell and broke her neck and went to a hospital. Thus you should not laugh.

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What's Worse then an apple with a worm? The holocaust

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What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

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A day without sunshine is like night.

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roses are red, violets are purple, sugar is sweet, and so are... hmmm...

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What's worse than the front page of anti-joke.com? The 4945th page of anti-joke.com, as those jokes have been rated poorly by other users.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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why did the man blink because i put a gun to his head.

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

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a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

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A horse walks into a bar the bar tender says hey you cant be in here you are a horse so the horse leaves.

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A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

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Yo Mommas so poor, when i went to her house and started to clear out the cob webs, she said why the heck are you tearing down the curtains.

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say iphone 5 times then look under your pillow ...nothings there

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What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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