Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

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How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

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My mom.

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Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

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Where do rabbais go to shop? At the supermarket like everyone else.

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, hes Jewish.

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You want to know what is worse than having a teen parent? Being a teen parent.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

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planking.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

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Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

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If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

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What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......

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knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

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Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

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"knock knock" "who's there" nobody answered cus it was a bunch of little shits playing knock a door run

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Whats funny? Nick Sotelo

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Not much of an anti joke but here we go... - What do you get when you cross a jew and a potato? - A Baked potato!

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Q: What is so funny about a dog chasing his tail? A: The dog cannot figue out that it his own tail, and every time he moves so does the tail. Therefore never reaching a satisfying end for the mentaly chalanged mutt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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