My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

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what do you call a cat that talks a talking cat

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Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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I have to tell you something. What? I just told you something.

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You're so gay you actively seek homosexuals relationships.

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why did the mexican cross the road? to catch its bus on the other side

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what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

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imadewords

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This is my joke. funny

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It says so on your cap.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Chuck Norris. Alright come in.

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What is worse than falling into a pit of needles? being lit on fire and then falling into a pit of needles I imagine

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Roses are red, Violets are blue I'm Schizophrenic and so am I

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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What do you call a teacher that gets wasted? A wasted teacher.

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how do you confuse helen keller? you put her in a room full of naked men and tell her that they are really candy canes

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why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

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Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

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A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says Why the bloody face? The shark replies by saying my wife beat me with a stick. Considering that sharks cant talk, the bartender ends up going to the doctor to see if he may be dillousinal.

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Whats the difference between a cobra and the hulk? One is my penis and the other one is a cobra.

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what did the black person say to the midget my dicks bigger than u

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Your mom goes to college

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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