What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Blood is red also Nothing else is blue

Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

Period Blood

How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

What do you call a black man driving a car? A driver.

Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

why did the chicken cross the road? to give a doctor the cure for cancer but some ass hole ran him over

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair, fuzzy wuzzy had cancerand died

Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven shot up his school and ate nine kids. Also before he was arrested he told six he was going to blow his brains out. Then he murdered the police and has been on the run ever since.

Bill is at a bar with a couple of his college buddies. He notices another one of his friends, Jim, who has his back faced to him, and calls him. The man turns and it is not Jim. Bill apologizes and they carry on with their lives.

Why do people always walk so slow when your in a rush to get somewhere? They don't it just seems like that

What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern pornography collections.

Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

whats brown and black and sits in a tree...... a bird

Four Chavs drove of a cliff today, why was a i sad? It was my car :C

what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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