What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

How do you kill somebody instantly? Make them smell Smelly mcD's socks.

John Katzenbach were drinking a soda... He is the author of The Psicoanalist

What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

Yo Momma is so ugly she probably doesn't have any friends.

What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean

roses are red violets are red everything's red i'm colour blind

Canida

what did the nazi say to the jew? hi

Knock, Knock Who's There. You. You who. You are you. WTF!

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? genocide whats worse than genocide? getting raped by a giant scorpion

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

What did the man say to the homeless child. Where's you parents?

Q: Why didn't the chicken cross the road. A: because he's a chicken?

Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Rape.

Q: Why did the young boy run away from girls and screamed that they had cooties? A: That's what little boys do. He also has an abusive home life

Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

A man went into a bakers to buy a loaf of bread. The baker said 'What can i do for you sir?' The man said 'Id like a loaf of blue bread please.' Baker replied 'Sorry sir we only sell brown or white here.' 'Thats ok.' said the man, 'I have my bike outside.' [This joke was made up by myself and my school friends in 1975 age 15. We all told it for years - i still do - and cried with laughter whenever we heard it. We called them non jokes :-) ]

Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:Why does everyone want to know it's just a chicken

What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

whats difference between a bench and a mexican? a mexican isnt a bench

Why did little Susie light herself on fire? Answer: She wanted to be warm

the guy below me is gay

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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