what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing? Answer - A gay homosexual

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

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How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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What do you give a Penn State waterboy for Halloween - Candy

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Roses are green Violets are yellow Those are the wrong colors oh well who gives a shit.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 was racist.

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How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

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How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

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A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

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Knock knock. Come in. Okay.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

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what happens when you mix a black guy and a Mexican? nothing, it is physically impossible to "mix" people.

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

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Knock, Knock Knock, Knock Knock, Knock No One's home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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