What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

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your moms so fat... she ways like 300 pounds.

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Q: How do you get a jewish girls number? A: You roll up her sleeve

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Joke.

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Why was Veronica lying on the sidewalk? She was just in a drive-by shooting.

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12 22 giraffe hippo 66 otter zebra cat 99 okay, the end

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What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

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Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

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What's blue and can't have sex? A blueberry

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

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Why did the child with terminal cancer and leprosy get sent to the principal's office? Because his parents and brother died in a car accident, and the principal though he should be informed.

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Your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it says 300 lbs.

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Why did the little girl selling lemon aid die? Someone drove by and threw a fridge at her

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

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The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

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I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

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What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

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Bin Laden is dead.

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

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Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

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Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

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You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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