What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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What's hard and straight going in, and soft and sticky coming out? chewing gum

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A whale walks into a bar, everyone says Hey, Ashely!

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigger

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guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

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What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

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Justin Bieber is a talented singer.

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If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You thought that this would be romantic, but alas, it is only gardening facts

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A black man, a jew and a racist walk into a bar, The racist proceeds to be a racist

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Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

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What's a boomerang that never comes back to you? A stick. :/

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Two blondes walk into a bar. There is a fat man there, but nobody talks to him

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How does a plumber cross the street? Using his legs

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If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

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Q. What gets louder as it gets smaller? A. A baby in a paper shredder

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KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

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what do you call a cat that talks a talking cat

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What do you call a guy who acts straight but is really not? Verl.

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A 36 year old Canadian woman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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