Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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knock knock who's there? julian julian who? julian gonzalez

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What smells, tastes, and looks like trash? Garbage.

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The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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knock knock your gay

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How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

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Why dose not the cat bark? Because it's a cat!

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dear GIRLS, roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad i will be there too not in the cage but laughing at u .

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why did the baby cross the road...? cause he was chained to my bumper

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

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How do you stop a skunk from smelling? Block its nose.

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ron:jim i cant get the toaster to work jim:dude thats a thats my car!

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

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Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Make his family cry!!!!!!!!!

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Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

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Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

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A man walked into the bar and ordered a drink, drank it then stood up and left remembering that he once had a drinking problem and had overcome it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

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Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shih-tzu? Dogs are large and solid objects and therefore cannot be mixed together.

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why don't you make like a tree. and get out of here

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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