A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?", laughs at his own joke, then calls animal control.

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Q: Whats funnier than Ryan Vallee? A: The death of your family -RDV

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One day I was walking in the forest when I saw a squirrel get hit by a van. It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Until I lost both my arms.

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What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

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why did the chicken cross the road because everyone on the other side already had bird flu

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If a dyslexic man walks into a bar, check your notes. You told the joke wrong.

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Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

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Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

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What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

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wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

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Why did Captain Hook die? He wiped.

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sticks and stones may break my bones but cataracts will prohibit you from eyesight

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What is the difference between a black guy and an asian? They are both black, except the asian

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Whats red and hairy ? A carpet !

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkled? Because if they were small, white, and round they'd be called aspirin.

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Kittens.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Carrots! ... well if they were invisible..

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What did the bubble do to the wall? Nothing it is a Bubble.

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whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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