What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's meaner than taking a candy from a baby? Tossing the baby of a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Nah

thumb_up thumb_down +37

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How can you tell that a blonde has been using a computer? You can't. There's no common link between computing habits and hair color.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Banana(s)

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man falls into a lake but no one is around to help him, luckily the man can swim so he got out of the lake and went home feeling embarrassed

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down +29

"This is not a drill!" - guy holding a hammer

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A black man, an Asian man, and a white man are stranded in the wilderness after their plane crashed. The black man has a flashlight, the Asian a bottle of water, and the white man a can of beans. They put their racial differences aside to increase chance of survival but were eaten by a pack of coyotes.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops