What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

This is a humorous joke, you will laugh.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Two black guys are in an elevator, one guy gets off at the sixth floor, and the other on the eighth. And thats it.

Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

A man walks into a bar.

Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

balls in ya mouf

Sup homie G. Shutup you are not black.

Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

What's the difference between a black man with a pie and an asian with an apple. They're of different ethnicitiesand cultures, and are holding different foods.

Last night I saw an elephant in my pajamas. I don't know why I went to the zoo in my pajamas.

I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

what's long, skin colored, erect, and limp? a finger.

Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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