A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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So a black man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He payed for the drink and couldn't have been more courteous

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what do you call a cat that talks a talking cat

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Asians are ugly and they look they have down syndrome.

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What is more tragic than a nice day wasted? Obesity.

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What do you call a lettuce named Andrew? Andrew.

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A straight man walks into a lesbian bar. He quickly realizes his mistake and leaves.

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When practicing the art of origami and the berrilium dialates, how many quince pies does it take to calculate a tree? Tricycle

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Your Mama's so fat she need some serious medication treating overweight.

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why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

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Knock knock SCREW YOU I BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a completely legit reason dumbass

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What's the difference between The Holocaust and baking pizza? Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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What's meaty and has a poof? A meatball with a bubble.

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Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

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What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

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Why did the girl cross the road? She didn't. Well, she tried but when she was halfway there, she was hit by a bus and had to be rushed to the hospital.

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Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

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A priest and a prostitute are sitting next to each other on a bus. The priest asks her what she does, and she says "I sell my body to strange men." The priest then explains to her about Christianity, and she gives up her ways and becomes a devout Christian.

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A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots his virgin

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Two horses, a man with a tall bun, three lesbians, an African woman and another man wearing a clown suit come up to you in your work outfit and shriek:"Happy Casual Friday!" Okay, so maybe this went too far.

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How do Chinese people name their kids? The couple discuss possible names and then pick the one that they feel suits the child best.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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