Romney 2012

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down.

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42.

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What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree ? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was attached to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a monkey.

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why did Max cry??? chicken

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How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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A bar walks into your mother.

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Why do black people cuss so much? Because f#*% you.

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What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

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Hey, want to hear a joke? Women's Rights

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was both deaf and blind and both senses are essential to a driver

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Q: Ask me if I'm a tree. A: No, I am not a tree.

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What do you get when an Asian and a black person have a baby? Black and yellow. Black and yellow. Black and yellow. :)

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Noobz -wondering why your valid anti-joke is getting voted down? Simply because it's a repeat, someone else has already submitted it. Only the original is valid for positive to votes. The regulars on here willallvote a repeat down immediately. I have 3 accounts set upwith different IP's just to do that. You have been warned. Search first mo fo's

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A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

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Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

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a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Q:What are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

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A man is walking down the street when, on the other side, he see's another man, with what appears to be an orange for a head. Unable to contain his curiosity, he approaches and enquires: "Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that you have you have an orange for a head..." "That's right" says the man with an orange for a head. "I met a magical genie one day who granted me three wishes..." "Amazing" says the first man, "Please continue". "Well, for my first wish, I wished I was incredibly rich, and that every day, I woke up in a four-poster bed full of used bank notes, and a statement with twenty zeros". "Did that happen?" askes the first man. "It did indeed", replies the man with an orange for a head. "I'm probably the richest man in the world". "Amazing!" replies the first man. "What did you wish for next?" "For my second wish, I wished to be incredibly attractive to women, and that every day, in my four poster bed full of money, when I awoke, there would be three of the most beautiful, naked women imaginable." "Wow! Did THAT happen?" "Of course! To be honest though, that gets a bit of a bind - walking around is a bit difficult these days, in fact, I'm on my way to pick up some cream." "No way, that's amazing!" says the first man. "What was your third wish?" "Well..." replies the man with an orange for a head, "For my third wish, I wished I had an orange for a head."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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